


golden age of something good (and right, and real)

by lotts (LottieAnna)



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Service Top, Smut, Under-negotiated Kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-01-01
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:48:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21948943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LottieAnna/pseuds/lotts
Summary: “Come on, baby,” Casey says. “Tell me how you want it.”Matt groans, which is how Casey knows thatbabydid the trick.
Relationships: Casey Cizikas/Matt Martin
Comments: 9
Kudos: 104
Collections: Hockey Holidays 2019





	golden age of something good (and right, and real)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [blueorangecrush](https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueorangecrush/gifts).

> IF YOU FOUND THIS THROUGH GOOGLING, KNOW ANYONE MENTIONED IN THIS STORY PERSONALLY, OR ARE MENTIONED YOURSELF: please, please click away. This is a work of fiction and nothing written in this story is true. Any accurate information used in this story is publicly available information about public figures, the rest is made up, 100%.
> 
> thanks to tj for the beta, and thanks to the mods for all their hard work and patience <3 
> 
> blueorangecrush-- i had so many different ideas that went in so many different directions for these two. i had au ideas, ideas involving sydney and kristy, ideas that involved telepathy, ideas that were angstier... in the end, i settled on this, which ended up being very different from what i expected. truthfully, this was supposed to be shameless smut about service top matt martin (which does feature heavily) but it turned into something a little more character-driven. i wanted to explore the types of challenges that couples face that help them grow and learn about themselves without challenging the stability of their relationship, i think? it was a journey getting here. i hope you like it!

Matt, in a move straight out of a romance novel, pushes Casey up against a wall and kisses him senseless.

“This sweater is ridiculous,” Matt says, the words almost lost, because he’s trying to talk and make out with Casey at the same time. “Why does it have Mickey Mouse on it?”

“We were—” he cuts himself off, temporarily having lost his train of thought, because Matt is kissing his neck, and that feels  _ good.  _ “—at a Christmas party. It’s festive.”

“It’s adorable,” Matt growls. “You need to stop.”

“I need to stop being adorable?” Casey says, laughing a bit. He’s feeling extra bubbly tonight, which is making him feel extra fond about Matt. That’s saying something, because he’s usually pretty bubbly and always incredibly fond about Matt, but something about tonight—the party, and the joy of leaving it to get some alone time, maybe—has everything feeling heightened. 

“You need to stop  _ wearing clothes, _ ” Matt says, and he’s working Casey’s sweater off before he’s even had time to process the words. 

“Whoa,” Casey says, not protesting at all. “What’s gotten into you?”

“We haven’t gotten any time alone lately,” Matt says. 

“We’ve been together nonstop for a week.” Casey’s mostly arguing for the sake of arguing, which Matt probably guessed, considering the fact that Casey’s kissing at his neck.

“Yeah, for the holidays, with our families,” Matt says. “Not exactly the sexiest atmosphere.”

“So that’s why you were so into getting that sweater off me,” Casey says. 

“Look, I like you no matter what you wear, but the less clothes, the better,” Matt says. 

“Can’t really argue with that,” Casey laughs, and then they’re making out again, Matt’s hands all over Casey’s body in the best possible way. 

Something about the urgency has Casey’s blood running a little hot, and he thinks back over the last week— he hasn’t really had to spend time away from Matt, per se, but when their families are around, it’s not quite the same. Casey… has missed Matt, weirdly enough. He’s missed his version of Matt, missed being able to retreat into their relationship. 

“Let’s make the most of our alone time, yeah?” Matt says. 

Casey hums in agreement. “What were you thinking?” 

“Anything,” Matt says, his voice so sincere it reaches deep down in Casey’s chest and tugs at something that he keeps buried most of the time. Things with Matt are best when they’re easy, but sometimes, they need to push their limits, until it’s all just a little bit too much.

It’s not a comfort zone, for either of them, but it’s a place they thrive. 

Maybe that’s what Casey wants tonight.

“Come on, baby,” Casey says. “Tell me how you want it.” 

Matt groans, which is how Casey knows that  _ baby  _ did the trick. It’s not something that Casey’s one to suggest, usually, but it’s definitely something he likes, and it’s something Matt  _ really  _ likes—needs, almost—when he’s like this. It’s hard for Matt to be okay being needy, but Casey loves the feeling of being needed, so it works, in its own way. They’ve carved out a space in their relationship where Matt can lean on Casey without having to deal with the baggage of obsessive self-reliance that he carries around every day. 

Sex, when feelings are involved, is good for that, generally speaking. And when it comes to Matt, Casey’s feelings will always be involved. Feelings for Matt have been one of the few constant things in Casey’s notably unpredictable life. 

He nudges Matt to turn around, presses him against the wall, kisses the back of his neck. “You want me right now?” he asks, rolling his hips up so Matt can feel that he’s already half hard. “Right here? Like this?”

Matt shivers. “I— that’s—” he inhales sharply as Casey starts to run his hands up and down his sides. “I want—” the end of the sentence gets lost in a whimper, and Casey eases off the movement for a bit, keeping his body pressed firmly against Matt’s. Sometimes, when Casey starts to use pet names and it turns into this… whatever it is that they do—the thing where Casey makes it his sole purpose to give Matt whatever it is he could possibly need to feel good—it can take Matt a while to string his thoughts together enough to turn them into sentences. 

“I want you on top of me,” Matt says, his voice sounding a bit steadier. “Riding me.” 

Casey gives Matt’s neck another kiss, which is his way of saying,  _ I’m proud of you,  _ without having to worry that he’s pushing this too far. 

“Yeah,” Casey says. “Let’s make that happen.” 

There’s another groan, and Matt’s turning around, pulling Casey in for another kiss. He’s taller than Casey, but there’s something about this desperation that’s making him feel small, easy to move around. 

They make their way to the bedroom, Casey gently tugging at Matt’s hand until they get to the bed. Matt tugs them both down, and they land clumsily on the bed, Casey straddling Matt’s hips. 

“Alright,” Casey says. He runs his hands over Matt’s torso. “You ready?”

“Yeah,” Matt says. 

Casey works his hands under Matt’s shirt, and Matt sits up to let him pull it over his head. He dismounts for a second to pull Matt’s pants off, and when he notices the large bruise on Matt’s upper thigh—right under his hip—he can’t help but press a kiss to it. He knows bruises are part of the territory, but he still loves Matt a lot, and would prefer it if he was never in pain. 

Matt moves at the touch. 

“Did that hurt?” 

“Nah,” Matt says. 

Casey kisses it again as he takes off Matt’s underwear, then quickly removes his own clothing before he straddles Matt again. He’s already so, so turned on, and he’d maybe take more time to get ready, but right now… he really,  _ really  _ wants Matt inside him. 

“I’m gonna grab the lube, okay?” Casey says. 

Matt’s dick twitches, and his head tilts back a little. “Fuck, yeah.” 

Good to know Matt’s also feeling impatient tonight, then. 

When Casey’s hand touches Matt’s dick, Matt reacts with his entire body. His wrists and ankles stay pinned to the bed, though, like they’ve been bound down with imaginary ties, and for a second, Casey pictures what it would be like, having Matt tied to his bed, writhing and desperate. 

It’s too much for Casey to handle. Matt might be ready for that, but for Casey… he’s not quite there yet. 

Someday, though. 

“I’m going to start slow,” Casey says. “Try not to move, okay?” 

Matt nods, and Casey wonders if it’s because he’s too overwhelmed to speak. He always gets so cautious when they do this, but he knows Matt likes it, and that’s what matters most— that Matt is okay letting go like this, that he trusts Casey to take care of him when it happens. When it comes down to it, that’s what Casey wants: to make Matt feel good in every way he can. 

It’s a balancing act, lowering himself onto Matt’s dick. In the physical sense, but also in the sense that it’s harder to check in on Matt when he’s also gotta keep an eye on himself. 

“Fuck, Case,” Matt says. “You’re…” 

“Yeah,” Casey says, and the word takes a lot out of him. 

“You’re so— tight,” Matt says. “God, that feels good.” 

“Good,” Casey says, lowering himself a little more, letting his body adjust. “So good.” 

He doesn’t want to push it too far, but sometimes the words slip out, and they’re too soothing, too sweet. 

It’s a slow process, but Casey lets it play out, doesn’t rush— he doesn’t want to hurt himself, and he definitely doesn’t want this to be over too soon. 

“You feel good,” Casey says. “You always feel so good.”

“God,” Matt says. “ _ God.”  _

There’s a simple fact that Casey has to live with every day, something he has to swallow down and breathe through so he can make it through his life. But when it rises to the surface, it’s hard to ignore, and right now, it’s at the forefront of Casey’s mind: he would do absolutely anything for Matt—absolutely  _ anything— _ and the amount of conviction he has about that fact is actually fucking terrifying. He’s pretty sure he’s not supposed to  _ be  _ this sure, not about anything, but Matt’s the exception to every rule Casey’s ever had, so it makes a weird sort of sense.

“I’m gonna start to move again, okay?” Casey says. 

Matt nods frantically. “Please.” 

“God,” Casey groans. His thighs are shaking with the effort of holding his weight when he’s moving this slow; he’ll probably be sore tomorrow, but right now, he couldn’t care less. 

Casey bottoms out with a loud groan, his hands firmly planted on Matt’s chest. He loves the feeling of being full like this— it used to feel like he was being split apart, but these days, it feels like he’s… whole. That’s the best word for it, which is unfortunate, because it sounds cheesy when he says it. He’s tried thinking of it in terms of metaphors, but everything he’s come up with—two puzzle pieces, a lock and key—is sort of gross, when he thinks about it literally. 

It’s not a physical thing, though. It’s just— they fit together. That’s all. 

Riding Matt always takes a lot out of him, and tonight is no exception. Casey will brace himself on the headboard for balance, but then Matt will grab at his chest and pull him down into a kiss, and Casey will have to stop moving so he can focus on it, let Matt know that he’s still here.

It’s weird— they’re so good at so much together, but sometimes, they’re just… really bad at talking. They’ll communicate other ways flawlessly, but when it comes to words, they’ll leave some important things unsaid. There are so many ways to tell Matt he loves him, but there’s only one way to ask hard questions— questions like,  _ is this something you want, or is this something you need? Is this anything at all? Is this too much? Is it enough?  _

But Casey will, eventually. They might not be good at these conversations, but they’ve had them before, because this matters a lot. Sometimes love is the easiest thing in the world, but sometimes, it’s voicing something you’re afraid to put words to because the other person is worth the risk. 

“I’m— close,” Matt says. “Can I—“

“Yeah, baby,” Casey says. “Come for me.”

He watches as Matt’s eyes fall shut, feels him thrust a few more times, erratic and desperate; then, Matt’s coming, and Casey slows down, following the pace Matt is subconsciously setting with his hands.

Afterwards, he gets up and cleans them both off, goes to the bathroom to splash water on his face. He considers hopping in the shower, but he decides against it— he can’t tell if he wants to check on Matt, or he needs to be near him for his own sake, but the outcome is the same either way, so he doesn’t dwell too much on the reason.

“Hey,” he says, walking back into the bedroom. “Bathroom’s yours, if you want it.”

Matt makes a noise. “I don’t think I can move,” he says, sounding a little steadier, more like himself. “I think you broke me.”

Casey smiles. “If anyone has a right to be broken, it’s me. I did all the work.”

“Fuck off,” Matt says. “Get your ass into this bed and spoon me.”

Casey obliges, because Matt is, objectively, an excellent little spoon, and subjectively, the most amazing human being on the entire planet.

He presses a kiss to Matt’s ear. “That was fun.”

Matt hums in agreement. “Yeah,” he says. A beat. “Thanks for doing that.”

“Of course,” Casey says. 

“It was… y’know,” Matt says. “Nice, and helpful, and stuff.”

“Helpful?”

“Like— I don’t know,” Matt says. “Never mind. That was a weird word.” 

“No,” Casey says. “I mean— I want to know.” 

“It’s kind of hard to explain,” Matt says. He shifts a little. “Can we talk about this later?” 

“Yeah, for sure,” Casey says. “Whatever you want.” 

“Alright,” Matt says, sounding a little more relaxed. He turns his head over his shoulder, just enough to press a small, nonsensical kiss to Casey’s nose. “I love you a lot.” 

“I love you a lot, too,” Casey says, giving Matt a kiss— a real one, on the mouth. “Always have and always will.” 


End file.
